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Have you ever experienced a restaurant meal so bad you refused to pay for dinner?
Last night was the first time that I have refused to pay for dinner. That’s not to say it was the first bad meal I have eaten, but it was the first time I dug my heels in and said enough is enough.
Which is how I found myself sitting at a table for four in the middle of a restaurant while my wife and kids picked up their stuff and legged it out the door after telling the waitress that I wanted to speak to the manager . As I sat there, surrounded by uneaten food and the eyes of other diners, who maybe did like their meals, the owner approached me to discuss the problem.
Eating out as a Family is a Big Deal
Rewind to the afternoon, my tenth wedding anniversary. With 2 young children we don’t go out as much as we used to. Not, as some imagine, due to the hassle of it all but because it’s expensive. Seriously, how do two kids with a combined weight of half of me eat so much?
My wife and I love Indian food but for the last few years we haven’t been able to have one as the nearest restaurant was nearly 60km away. That all changed recently when a local Indian restaurant started trading.
We decided that it was time to hit the town and paint it red, well maybe half the town, we had kids in tow and didn’t have all night.
First up we grabbed some drinks overlooking the marina. This area caters for the reef boats and has amazing views across the mountains and water. Picture perfect at sunset. Suitably in the mood we decided to move on to a restaurant for dinner. Normally overflowing with choices, we found that nearly everywhere was shut due to the quiet season.
Rather disappointed, we decided to try the new restaurant. Ever the optimist, I wasn’t putting too much weight on two reviews I’d heard recently that pointed to mediocre at best. I was looking forward to getting stuck in to a lovely curry. While northern Indian is heavier than its southern counterpart I love both styles and wasn’t put off by the fact that the menu was all looking rather heavy. Finding out it was a BYO I ran up the road to the bottle shop for a bottle of Sav Blanc to celebrate our special day.
It was on my return that things started going south. First up, the complimentary poppadoms and minted yoghurt. Supermarket variety with a dip that was mint jelly and yoghurt mixed together. Still, I ignore the warning signs, I desperately want to believe that the mains will be good. We don’t eat out often so I am like a deer in the headlights, I can’t turn away, offering the company line “very good thank you” when the plates were cleared.
The End of the Indian Dream
Soon the mains come out and I know that this big eyed deer is going to get run over here. Three totally different dishes all looking the same colour with what I am sure is the same base sauce. Quite possibly a packet mix from the local supermarket. The garlic naan was actually good and was eaten by all. That was where it stopped. My wife wasn’t happy about the sub standard slop we were served. Now this was our tenth anniversary and I didn’t want it to be ruined so was tight lipped. The food was beyond terrible but what do you do? Well my wife knew what to do.
She made it clear that leaving wouldn’t ruin her night but paying for this food would.
I’ve eaten on numerous railway stations across India, every one of those meals was vastly superior to this slop. It was decided, I agreed and she got up with handbag to speak to the waitress. She doesn’t normally do confrontation so I was surprised by her speaking until she walked right past and collected the children and said the manager would be out to speak with me. Ah, I see.
The manager approached and I explained that the food wasn’t worth paying for. Sitting there, telling someone that what is cooked and served isn’t worth paying for isn’t as easy as one thinks. Until I look him in the eye and realise he knows what I am saying is true. He puts out the usual line that everyone else has been happy, even though I know that isn’t true. I explain and go through each dish and its merits, or lack of. Nothing is denied, and when I refused to pay for dinner he is fine, if that is what I want.
Yes it is what I want, because I won’t pay $70 for a meal that I wouldn’t want to eat.
I leave and get into the already running car and we head for some fish and chips. Surely that can’t be ruined. Surely.
Is it OK to Complain?
So what does the average punter do when faced with a dish or meal that isn’t what they expected or is clearly lacking in quality? Complain! Likewise, complaining about poor restaurant service.
You see as a chef, nothing pleases me more than happy customers loving my food. Lets face it, everyone loves their ego stroked. But if we have dropped the ball then we need to know. I have always had a belief that if the customer genuinely doesn’t feel that they should pay, then they won’t. People with a genuine issue will explain the issues and not make a big scene. I don’t nibble every steak that goes out, so if there is a problem with a batch the only way I will know is from customer feedback.
The bottom line is, don’t be afraid, talk to the manager about a refund. If it helps, think how long it took you to work for the money to pay that bill. It’s what I do, you would be amazed at how that steels your reserve to put your hand up.

What about you? Have you ever refused to pay for dinner?
Alyson says
Absolutely! You should always complain, if the food is bad, you shouldn’t hand over cash for it. Particularly when the restaurant in question is clearly trying to fleece customers.My exception would be if we were travelling and the restauranteur was working hard to make a living. I’ve paid for food with cockroaches in it in Asia, but the food was good and the bugs are rather out of the control of the owner.
Korina says
I refused to pay for our meals once when we were served off (yes off) pork, gagging!
Kids ate their meals so happy to pay for them.
Owner was threatening to call the cops, we were at a stalemate until a guy new to the queue waiting to pay also piped up saying his pork was off too!
Needless to say they didn’t insist on us paying anymore but were still very rude about it.
Worst part was my son left his shoes under the table and I had to go back in to get them! Lol
Made my day when I saw a couple of months later they had closed down.
Chef says
Hi Korina thanks for the reply. I have to say that it isn’t acceptable in any case to serve off food. While I also reckon it happens far more than people realise. Unfortunately the councils that regulate food establishments normally only respond to complaints after the fact. Good to see that they were closed down. Also speaking as a chef never be afraid to voice concerns about food. If they are worth their weight in salt they will have nothing to fear. I for one will always walk through the restaurant during and after service.
Sarah says
We have complained on a few occasions but we also make it a point to compliment when applicable as well. The best service we have had in Australia was in Melbourne at a place called Dandenong Pavilion. We called the manager out to tell him how fantastic everything was and it turned out to be the owner. We then went to Urban Spoon and sang its praises. I reckon if you are willing to do both then it’s perfectly fine.
Chef says
Hi Sarah Thanks for the reply. Couldn’t agree more you need to speak the truth with restaurants. Both good and bad should be equally well received. Of course everyone loves their ego stroked but we won’t improve if we don’t actually get the comments that allow us to improve dishes that we otherwise wouldn’t.
Annie André says
Good on you….
I have never NOT paid for bad food although i once had a ceaser salad with grilled chicken. I took a bit and thought, HMMMM ODDDD, this ceasar has blue cheese in it. When i looked down it was the chicken that had gone bad and i swear i saw maggots. I was too embarrassed to say anything because i swallowed a big hunk of the off meat.
Looking back, i wish i had said something. SIGH..
Chef says
Hi Annie great to hear your story. Not so good to hear about the swallowed rotten meat! I reckon your not alone in looking back and wishing you had spoken up. I think that it is how some places survive so long. Relying on the fact people aren’t confident to complain or simply don’t want to rock the boat. If it was up to me the boat needs rocking a lot more than we do.
Forrest says
Not paying is acceptable as long as you tip your wait staff
Chef says
Thanks for reading Forrest, Yes it wouldn’t be fair to penalise the wait staff due to the kitchens poor performance. That said, it isn’t customary to tip in Australia, unlike the States and Europe. Truth be told I normally don’t complain, knowing how hard kitchen staff work I try to give them the benefit of the doubt. This time though I couldn’t do that as they were so far off the mark. Just had a quick read of your blog, great stuff, love some of the countries you have visited and want to visit the others!
Cheers
James
jody says
twice i have refused to pay for an entire meal, once was over 10yrs ago in a beachside town south of where i live, entree was fine main however came with a side dish of a large long black hair! ewww… i was horrified and ushered the waitress over quietly and asked for a new meal as the hair was an added extra not ordered….she took the plate, the manager then proceed to our table to tell me that i could have another meal as long as i paid for both ( the one sent back and the replacement)!!! he then proceeded to tell me it was my hair!! i was blonde and had shoulder lenght hair at the time…. that was the last straw! i then raised my voice so that other diners could hear and proceeded to tell him that there was absolutely NO way that i would be paying for a meal i had returned due to staff hair in it and for his rudeness i would not be paying any bill at all. and promptly got up and left my fellow diner in tow… 2nd time was in a local well esteemed restaurant and they served my husband off meat, to which the manager whom happened to be walking past was grabbed and told of the situation he quickly sent it back to the kitchen ( yes chef agreed it was off) was then offered an alternate dish which hubby accepted and at the end of lunch it was free anyway! that was great service!! and a couple of free beers to boot ( we did pay for our entree’s happily).
Chef says
Thanks for reading Jody, That is unbelievable, yes hair does on occasion get into food, although it shouldn’t, but that reaction is priceless. I’ve never heard of that before. The second case worries me. Great service and fair play they held up their hands but what sort of chef can’t tell if meat is off? It was obvious to you so it should have been to them. Like a mechanic putting a flat tyre on a car. At least you survived. I would have fired the chef that served that or at the very least first and final.
Cheers James
natasha says
I do speak my mind and have sent away many dishes that are not to my liking. Most to the time these are replaced with another dish that turns out to be better than the first. Unfortunately I don’t have the courage to wake up and refuse to pay for the meal but I like your last paragraph about having to earn that money – I will remember these words and use it when required at my next horrible meal .
Chef says
Thanks Natasha, It is true, and the longer I work and older I become, the more I won’t accept rubbish. I’ve had to send food back as well and it is true, the second round rarely impresses much more.
Cheers James
Renee - RambleCrunch says
Good for you!!! I’ve never not paid for a meal, but I wish that weren’t the case. We’ve had plenty of crap meals, especially on the road, but there was a particular one in Sienna that was so stinking bad, so insulting, so grotesque that I wish we’d just stomped out. It started with bruschetta that was actually toast (I mean white bread from the toaster) with mashed tomatoes on it, and the rest of the meal went downhill from there. It happened two years ago and I’m still mad at myself for not getting up and marching us all out. And to top it off the waiter was so rude to us…they all know it’s crap. Again, good for you!
Chef says
Thanks for reading Renee, Oh dear that is a horror story. I do normally put up with a lot but if that happened to us I wouldn’t be happy. As I get older as well I seem to be happy to complain more.
Cheers James
Suzanne Sherwood says
I remember the pub in Tring with the spicy hamburgers!!!
Chef says
Yes but I wasn’t there for that unfortunately. No doubt that would have been the second meal I would have refused to pay for.
Thanks for Reading.
Chef